Sometimes when people ask me if I'm nervous I'm not sure what they mean or how to respond. I'm actually more nervous about the life changes that come from being a Mom than I am about giving birth and being a Mom itself. I'm worried about how I'm going to fill my days and still feel worthwhile and successful without working (even though I realize this is just worldly success). I'm worried about making friends with other moms. I'm worried about being relatable to my friends in different stages of life. I'm worried about feeling lonely or cooped up sometimes as I know I'm going to be really busy with my mom and homemaking duties and won't be getting out as much. I'm worried that I won't live up to everything I want to as a Mother- that I won't be as patient or as fun as I want to be.
But I can tell you what I'm excited for. My heart almost bursts with love and excitement when I imagine the love I am going to feel for this little human. To watch him grow and learn. To pour my heart and soul into trying to raise this little boy the best way that I will know how. To know that he has a family who loves him so much more than he will ever know. To watch Parker become a Dad and to watch them bond. To know that he will have Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, and cousins who already adore him and haven't even met him yet. I'm so excited to experience life again through the eyes of a child. I know that I will learn way more from being a mother to this sweet little guy than he will ever learn from me. I'm so excited to get to know him. I'm so excited to see who he takes after. To see which personality traits he gets from me, and which ones he gets from his Dad. Woo, I'm fighting back tears writing this. I know that I'm about to enlist in the biggest adventure of my life. And I'm terrified, but I'm so so so so so excited.
Only seven more weeks, little man. We can't wait to meet you.
